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What pet is always found on the floor?
Carpet

What is the smartest kind of bee?
A spelling bee.

How do pigs write?
With a pig pen.

What is the best year for a kangaroo?
A leap year.

What kind of leopard has red spots?
One with the measles.

What do you get if you cross an insect with a rabbit?
Bugs Bunny

What kind of food does a racehorse eat?
Fast food

Did you hear the riddle about the skunk?
Never mind, it stinks.

How do you fix a broken gorilla?
With a monkey wrench.

What animal talks the most?
The yak

What do you get if you feed a lemon to your cat?
A sour puss

What did the dog say to the child pulling his tail?
That's the end of me!

Why should you never tell a secret to a pig?
Because he'll squeal!

What kind of horse only appears after the sun goes down?
A nightmare

What bird never needs a haircut?
A bald eagle

What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bull dozer

Where do frogs sit?
Toadstools

What do you call a pig driving a car?
A road hog

What is a calf after it is six months old?
Seven months old

What cat lives in the ocean?
An octopus!

Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don't work.

What is the most valuable fish?
Goldfish

What fish is the brightest?
Sunfish

What bird can lift the most?
The crane

What was the name of the skunk who painted the Mona Lisa?
Leonardo DaStinki

What happened when the centipede broke all of his feet?
He didn't have a leg to stand on.

What pet makes the loudest noise?
A trumpet

What do you call a bee that is always complaining?
A grumble bee

What do you call a kangaroo at the North Pole?
A lost kangaroo

What do you call a fish on a motorcycle?
A motor pike

What do you call the place where parrots make movies?
Pollywood

What animal can jump higher than a house?
Any animal.
Houses can't jump.

What animal is always at baseball games?
A bat

What did the porcupine say to the cactus?
Is that you mom?

What do you call a crate full of ducks?
A box of quackers

What do dogs and trees have in common?
Their bark

What did the dog say when it sat on sandpaper?
Ruff!

What happens to ducks who fly upside down?
They quack up.

Which side of a bird has the most feathers?
The outside

Why does a hummingbird hum?
It doesn't know the words.

Why shouldn't you play cards in the jungle?
Because of all the cheetahs.

What do you call mean antelopes?
Bad gnus

Why don't grizzlies wear shoes?
So they can go bear foot.

What happened to the cat who ate a ball of wool?
She had mittens!

What dog loves to take bubble baths?
A shampoodle

How do you stop a dog from barking in your front yard?
Put him in your back yard.

What do you give a sick pig?
Oinkment